I also think that many people both male and female stay in relationships even though they are unhappy because a) they don't want to be alone b) convenience c) financial reasons
Thursday 9 December 2010
I was just looking for a personal opinion on girls and boys, based on the people you have come across. How do they seem to you. Not looking for a definitive answer based on everyone in the world, lol. And similar for love. Just your thoughts that's all :)
you got my thoughts :) I'm sorry but I don't know what else to say about it :/
Wednesday 8 December 2010
Do you think girls are happier than boys? In general. Interested to know what you think. Think there is a lot of pressure on people these days to be seen to conforming to the stereotypical relationship portrayed by the media etc.
again i don't know how I am supposed to know this answer, without researching it. I think both men and women are increasingly becoming more insecure (especially with regards to their looks) due to pressure from the media
Do you think most people know what love is? Boys or girls.
I'm not sure how you expect me to know the answer to such a question :/ wthout researching and asking hundreds of people, I've no idea.
Friday 3 December 2010
How's the new book coming along? Will we get to read it soon?
yes it's all going well thank you. Lots of guys wanting to help which is great, but I still need more! if you sign up on my site, you'll get a sample of what I'm doing in the next few months :) http://www.rebeccadakin.com/why-men-cheat/
Wednesday 1 December 2010
How do you game boys without appearing needy, etc? thanx
have a busy social life, lots of friends, be indepenedent, and let guys call/text you ;-p needy people have too much time on their hands!
Have you ever thought of escorting purely for companionship? I'm guessing you did a lot of this before, but it could be your only focus now. A way of helping guys deal with their problems. But perhaps you think guys are beyond help, lol.
er, I do!? I guess you haven't seen my site then? I have platonic dates booked next week. http://www.miss-b.net and new site coming soon, with further dating services and advice for single men.
Tuesday 30 November 2010
Rebecca Dakin, Infidelity expert and author of The Girlfriend Experience
Please check out my new blog.....http://www.thegirlfriendexperience.tv
Here are my other new websites....
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Monday 29 November 2010
If you only had a month left to live, what would you do with it?
can't you think fo your own questions? ;-p I'm not good at these generic ones. Erm.... I'd travel the world
Tuesday 16 November 2010
If you could choose any job in the world to do, or universe, lol, what would it be, and what would you want to achieve while doing it?
Solo singer. I'd like to be a multi million record sales artist who's music like Madonna sustains interest and evolves, through the decades and whose music makes me an icon of a particular music genre :)
Am I the only guy who very often prefers close seductive contact and cuddles to sex? The thing is all women think men only want sex. Any ideas to help allay a woman's fears? But perhaps all the woman wants is sex, lol.
Nope not at all :) I discuss in my book The Girlfriend Experience that it's one of the biggest misconceptions that men only want sex. I made exactly that point, that 'men are a lot more in need of general closeness and love and affection than women give them credit for'. The way to ally a woman's fears is to simply tell her how you feel and show her, by not trying to get into her knickers when you are making out.
Monday 25 October 2010
What is your advice for people that are unhappy within themselves?
get help! There are lots of books, and advice and support out there, but people are too lazy and just like to moan without being proactive and searching for information on how to change. It's hard work, but do'able once you get the right mind set and work hard at it
What would your ideal man look like. What characteristics and vibe would he ideally have. Would you want to be with him 24/7, or have your time together punctuated with time apart. Do you find it easy to be alone, and happy within yourself.
I don't care about looks... l like a man who looks after himself and is hygienic. I don't want to be with anyone 24/7! I've been single for over 3 years, I'm confident, driven and ambitious, so I don't have time to be bored and lonely, but it would be nice to find that special someone to share my life with
Do you fear for the future of humanity? What is your idea of heaven on earth?
yes we're going to be over run by chavs in a few years time because they're the ones breeding whole football teams and that have kids that have kids. Sensible, educated people are putting their careers first and settling down later on in life and having smaller families. This thought terrifies me :/ heaven on earth ermmmm..... dunno sorry... a mountain of shoes? ;-p
Tuesday 19 October 2010
When you find yourself a lovely boyfriend who deserves it, will he be on the receiving end of all the lovely attention and ego-massage you used to lavish on clients? Or do you think it's not possible to give that to a man 24/7, even if you love him?
The reason I was good at my job as an escort, is because I genuinely like to make people feel good about themselves. I had 3 long term relationships when I worked as an escort, and each of them knew about my job. I could never compare boyfriends to clients because they are completely different - one is a job, and one is personal. However whenever I have a boyfriend, I am a very loving, giving, tactile, and caring person and they get all that and more :)
Monday 18 October 2010
Following on from your last answer, is there anything you can do to help men with their perceived deficiencies (from a female perspective at least) in genetic and social makeup. Anything at all? lol
Regarding men's egos, there isn't anything anyone can do, they either have an ego or they don't. Regarding mens insecurities it's difficult because men aren't natural communicators, and for anyone to deal with insecurities they need to be able to voice them and by voicing them people can feel vulnerable, which can put many off. Also I think some men find it difficult to understand why they feel a certain way, so they genuinely don't know why they feel insecure.
I believe my next book, 'Why Husbands Stray' will certainly help men in a way that by telling me their stories they themselves are finding the process therapeutic, and they're having to think back and try to remember why they did certain things and how they were feeling, which isn't something that they had thought about before. I also believe this book will help women understand men more and be more sensitive to their insecurities, which in turn may help men.
Friday 15 October 2010
Why do you think men are more insecure than women? Perhaps their egos are bigger? Or they feel that being with a woman is something they have to do to find themselves, and becomes an obsession, but doesn't provide the answers they are looking for.
Definitely bigger egos! 'Find themselves'?! Lol, definitely not. The more guys get the attention (even though it's manufactured and the result of a business arrangement), the more they seek it and crave it, and then yes it can become somewhat of an addiction, and some guys become completely delusional.
Thursday 14 October 2010
Was there a single characteristic you noticed about guys who were looking for an escort. Looking for a bit of depth in an answer rather than "they just wanted a good time", or "they were lonely" :-)
I think that most wanted to feel attractive and desired, and to have an attractive lady genuinely interested in them. In my experience men seem to be a lot more insecure than women.
Friday 8 October 2010
You say in your book that you were worried about "falling" for one guy. You only saw him once through bad luck but were willing to see him again if he could manage it. Why were you worried, and if you were worried why would you risk seeing him again?
When I referred to that particular date what I said was meant tongue in cheek, not to be taken literally. I'm sorry if that wasn't clear. I was basically trying to get across that it was one of the best dates I'd had. I'd have loved him to book me again, because we had an amazing date! It's doubtful I would fall for someone that I hardly ever saw, there would have needed to be some consistency for me to potentially get attached to him. Who knows I might have met him again, and it could have been completely different and I might have gone right off him! :)
Sunday 3 October 2010
How would you define love? Most people's idea of love is an addictive, clinging quality, that they need to complete themselves. I guess this is why escorts are in such high demand!
wow thats a profound question lol :) er love is difficult to define, and there's lots of different kinds of love. I've never had the 'clinging' kind of love, and I guess that's a good thing. Love to me, is a deep admiration, respect and caring for a person.
You are pretty. Not just in a visual sense. But in the way you come across in your recent video interview. How important is being pretty to you? How would you like to be different from the way you are?
Thank you for your compliment :) sadly I'm very self conscious of my looks, but I guess a lot of women are nowadays.
Monday 27 September 2010
What makes Gordon Ramsay so sexy?
his confidence and passion in his cooking. Plus he's a bit rough round the edges.. which i like :)
Monday 13 September 2010
what has been the feedback from any of your former clients who have been mentioned in your book ?
Two of them I am still very close friends with now, and both say they enjoyed the Girlfriend Experience very much, and found it interesting to read my perceptions of our dates. Other ex clients have written to me disappointed they weren't mentioned! lol :)
I loved your book! Not really a question I just wanted to tell you how fabulous it was. From a fellow happy escort x
thank you! I am so pleased you enjoyed it. Please feel free to write a book review on Amazon if you have time :) all the best x
in your book perhaps future book(s), do any of your former clients (not just any client to make it tie in with your own story) give their perspective on the whole escorting experience? what they got out of it. frustrations. expectations etc.?
Have you read my book?
There are a couple of my escort reviews that were from an online review site, that I quoted in the book, so that showed what those particular people thought about their dates with me. Since I have stopped escorting the reviews are now no longer available online. I had over 50 positive reviews :)
It was important for me to get outside input into The Girlfriend Experience, which is why there were not only ex clients views on me and our dates, but it is also why my mum and various family members and friends wrote their thoughts on my chosen profession. I wanted it to be a well balanced book, showing different people's views/thoughts as well as my own.
Tuesday 7 September 2010
how often did you get tested for STD's? did you ever do it without a condom?
Every 3 months and I was always clear. They are very helpful at the STD clinic if you tell them you do sex work. I had all my hepatitis injections, and they provide free condoms. I always used condoms except with 2 people that I was extremely fond of, and this was in my first year escorting. When I got accused of giving one of them an STD, I went and had myself checked out. I was fine, it transpired he had caught something off his wife who was having an affair with a guy at her gym! That made me realize that I'd been very silly, and I used them religiously ever since.
Monday 6 September 2010
i guess i meant some of the key things someone would need to address emotionally / psychologically post-escorting. not yourself perhaps as you were always doing what you wanted to do. never forced into things. but even then, there might be little things?
ah ok. I can't really say because I have no 'issues' myself after escorting either emotionally or psychologically. I don't feel any different. I am still hoping to meet my Mr Right, and live happily ever after :) I can't speak for other escorts and I don't personally know of any ex escorts that have had problems, well those that have, had problems before they started escorting, so aren't industry related. Of course there will be lots of ladies that have had to address issues post escorting, but you're asking the wrong person, sorry I can't be of more help.
Do you think the lady interviewing you in your first blog video fancies you? She's certainly trying hard to talk in her sexiest voice :o)
lol nooooo my dear friend Nikki is well and truly straight. Sorry to spoil your fantasy ;-p
what are some of the key things someone needs to do to be able to leave escorting. there are people who enjoy it, but many who don't. i guess everyone has a different situation. but there must be common things to be able to deal with to be able to stop?
Your question is a bit unclear, so I hope I've covered what you want to know.... Ladies that work as independent escorts can leave/stop at any time! People don't need to be 'able' to do anything. You just stop. Simples.
You should always have a back up plan/skill so that you can do something else if you have to or want to stop.
Ladies that don't enjoy it shouldn't be doing it. It is extremely damaging to women to carry on escorting if they don't want to do it and aren't enjoying it.
If you mean what tips would I give to escorts? it would be this golden solitary rule..... 'never ever do anything you don't want to do' that's it pure and simply. If you stick to this, you will always be ok working.
Only see who you want, when you want and on your terms and ALWAYS be prepared to walk away if you are not happy/comfortable.
If someone takes a job serving fast food just because they need the money, is it different to someone doing sex work just because they need the money?
In my opinion - no. Having worked in the sex industry and being someone who thinks there is nothing morally wrong with it, I'm sure I've answered as you would have expected me to answer - other people however are not as open minded as me :)
However saying that what you have to remember is that the two jobs are not comparable. In one you are selling food, in sex work you are selling yourself. Sex work is fraught with potential danger, and a risk of loss of self respect and a whole host of things that can cause ir-repairable damage to a person both physically and mentally.
There's also the fact that you'll never get addicted to the money working in a fast food joint, but you can get very easily addicted to the money you can earn in the sex industry.
do you have any specific plans, other than your book and associated publicity? have you any other plans to help people who might benefit from your help?
I love to help people! And would find it very rewarding to help escorts wanting to get out of the business, support for ladies in the business, advocating the legalization of prostitution, and any agony aunt/relationship advice for men and women. The problem is I need to earn a living, so for me to put a lot of time into these things I'd have to make it pay.
Anyone can email me for agony aunt/relationship advice as long as they don't mind if I anonymously put it on my blog, along with my reply. Were you referring to something particular?
following on from question about leaving escorting; has your self-esteem been affected since quitting escorting? I presume your dates were CONSTANTLY telling you how beautiful you are and beaming from gratitude. Do you miss that aspect?
Job/customer satisfaction/gratitude.... Of course I miss all that, but I think anyone does who takes pride in their work/business.
My self esteem hasn't been affected by finishing escorting. I am actually getting more interest from men in my personal life now that I have finished escorting. Maybe I'm giving off different vibes somehow. I have been on a few real dates, so I still receive compliments and I have some amazing male friends, who love and appreciate me, for which I am very grateful.
I am naturally a very caring, loving and generous person so I get fulfillment in my personal life from my friendships/relationships.
Thursday 2 September 2010
you seem like a level headed person. able to do things that the majority wouldn't be able to do without eventually going off the rails. what's your secret? do you find it hard to adjust post escorting?
If you read my book you'll find out ;-p
I think you've hit the nail on the head, I'm level headed, strong minded, strong willed - don't do anything I don't want to do, and god help anyone who tries to make me ;-p Escorting isn't for everyone, and like most jobs it takes a certain type of person to deal with it emotionally/physically. All I can say from a personal point of view is that I ran my escorting as a business, listened to my gut instinct, didn't do anything I didn't want to do, was prepared to walk away, was fussy with who I saw, and when I did see people they had to see me on my terms not theirs.
Even if I was strapped for cash I wouldn't take on a job I didn't think would suit me. This wasn't just for my benefit it was for theirs too, I hate to disappoint people, so I wouldn't accept a job if I didn't think I was the right person for it. Many girls took whatever they could, and that's when it gets dangerous. Some girls get greedy.
Guys thought they had the upper hand because they were paying, they were making the choice, but the choice was mine! It was mine whether I decided to see them, and thought that I could provide them with a memorable, special experience that would be mutually enjoyable, and it was mine when I chose to give my body. Mens money did not entitle them to see me, or be intimate with me.
Yes it's very hard to adjust post escorting. The thing I miss the most apart from meeting many wonderful and interesting people, is the fabulous restaurants and hotels. I still offer platonic dates so do get the opportunity every now and then to go to nice restaurants, but not often.
Having to also curb my spending, has been the biggest challenge.
The best thing is that I am actually being asked out on real dates, which didn't happen so much before. I must be giving off different vibes :)
Wednesday 24 March 2010
The Girlfriend Experience
60 year old escort on This Morning new post on http://www.thegirlfriendexperience.tv/
Tuesday 23 March 2010
The girlfriend Experience
New posts on the new Girlfriend Experience blog... http://www.thegirlfriendexperience.tv/
Monday 1 February 2010
Billie and Brooke Interview...
new post on my new blog The Girlfriend Experience can be found here...
Monday 18 January 2010
New The Girlfriend Experience Blog...
It's pretty much finished now apart from a few minor tweaks :) You can listen to be interviews, watch my TV debate with John Stapleton, see old archive photographs and now view my posts in categories/subject matters making the posts much easier to read. I am really pleased with it. Any comments or feedback on my posts on my new Girlfriend Experience blog would be appreciated.
Saturday 9 January 2010
New improved blog - under construction
The Girlfriend experience blog can now be found here The Girlfriend Experience . Please bear with me as it still needs work, but keep a look out over this next week as it takes shape :)
Thursday 7 January 2010
SMS strikes again....
On my way back on the plane I found myself sitting next to a 40'ish year old man with SMS (that's single man syndrome - as I refer to it in my book the Girlfriend Experience). I bit my lip for so long but like torrettes I ended up uncontrolably having to say something to him. He was extremely overweight (not a problem in itself) however when breakfast was put in front of him he greedily scoffed the lot like someone who hadn't eaten for weeks, in barely 5 minutes without so much as looking up from his tray. This was repulsive and vulgar anyway, however after, he held each carton close to his mouth and started noisily and furiously using his finger and licking and scooping up all of the residue in each individual carton - the fruit?!, the yoghurt and the cooked breakfast. I looked at him a couple of times with distaste but he was so oblivious and engrossed in his vulgar eating that he didn't even notice. I started to physically feel sick, and decided to tell him so. He apologised but by then it was too late he was left with gleaming cartons that looked like they'd never contained any food or anything at all for that matter.
Using my vast experience of the habits of some single men, I deduced that he was definitely single, and possibly lived with his mum.
Some of you may think it was rude for me to say something but trust me these sort of people are very thick skinned. He won't have even thought twice about what I said and it will not affect his eating habits in future unfortunately.
I really feel like I could do some good by teaching basic table manners to some of these guys. I feel another business idea coming on haha :) The problem is that the people with these problems don't actually realise that they have a problem - like this particular guy. They are that self obsessed that they are just in their own little world. They probably have no idea why they never get asked out for dinner!
Tuesday 5 January 2010
Met one of my heros at the airport!
When I arrived back in Heathrow after a long 26 hours of travelling my taxi driver found me and out of the corner of my eye I saw Richard Branson. Now I've seen him and various other celebrities I admire before but I've never had the balls to say anything to them for fear of getting brushed off or ignored, but this time I thought if I don't, I'll regret it.
Richards autobiography is one of the ones I read just before I started writing. I even mentioned him in my acknowledgements. He made me realise that that cheesy cliche that 'you can do anything you put your mind to' is really true. If you want something bad enough you can get it. I love the way he built his empire and I have a lot of respect for him as a business man. People I know who have met him have said he was friendly so I was pretty sure he'd have a little time for me.
So I approached him and said that I enjoyed his book and that he's inspired me and that he had a mention, and my autobiography had been published in June. He thanked me, asked me my name, pecked me on the cheek and shook my hand and asked me to send him a copy of my book! I was so excited! So I shall. Maybe Virgin will print my next? :)
Santa found me in Thailand!
My friend and I had an amazing time in Thailand. The weather was hot hot, the people were amazing and so friendly. The sunsets were picturesque, and the beaches beautiful. The massages were so cheap (between £5 and £10) that I had about 3. The best one being in a little place on the beach as the sun was going down. Thailand is now one of my fave places and I definitely want to go back very soon. I haven't had a 2 week holiday since I travelled to NZ in 2004, and it was great to be able to properly unwind and relax. No phone no internet, just total relaxation.
We spent Christmas day on the beach drinking cocktails as the sun went down before going back to our hotel for a Christmas dinner, cooked and arranged by the hotel manager who was an English guy. We had turkey with all the trimmings, even pigs in blankets. But also bwocolli and yorkshine puddings :))))) This was topped off with traditional Thai dancing, and fire entertainment. We danced and partied all through the night.
Something funny happened on Christmas eve.... my friend and I were joking with Bruce Lee (as he liked to be called) about whether Santa would find us in Thailand. He said we'd have to keep our doors open for him to get in, and we all had a laugh about it.
Later on we had forgotten about this little convo, and as I collapsed in bed after a rather heavy night out I fell into a deep sleep. Only to be woken a couple of hours later with a gentle nudge. I jumped up in fright and saw Bruce in a Santa hat sitting at the side of my bed holding as little tree decoration 'present'. Now as people that know me will know I am not the best person to wake up in the night! Lol.
"What are you doing? what do you want?" I asked repeatedly, frustratedly, half asleep. Poor Bruce I wish I could have seen his face. I'm surprised I didn't scare him off with my eye mask and ear phones I must have looked like some sort of weird alien!
In the morning I wondered if it had all been a dream it was very vague, but as I looked at the side of my bed I found the santa hat and present on the floor where he had scarpered after my tirade of questions about what on earth he was doing. He must have just dropped everything and ran out!
It was very weird and freaky, however I am sure he didn't mean any harm. He too was drunk and he probably thought it was a funny thing to do at the time.
The next day he couldn't look me in the eye, but eventually he called me over and I told him he had scared me and shook my finger at him (his english wasn't very good) to try to say it wasn't a good thing to do. He understood and thankfully it was all forgotten about.
Poor Bruce being only about 4' tall was more like Santa's little helper than Santa himself. Bless :)
I tell ya what though I never forgot to lock my door again after that no matter how much I'd had to drink! Lol :)
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